


All Was Golden

by Bandom_Squirrel



Category: Bandom, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:48:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24799456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bandom_Squirrel/pseuds/Bandom_Squirrel
Summary: Ryan Ross wasn’t planning on falling in love. It wasn’t that he was actively avoiding it, but he had a plan. And that plan left no room for romance.A short little songfic of When the Day Met the Night
Relationships: Ryan Ross/Brendon Urie, Spencer Smith/Jon Walker
Comments: 1
Kudos: 14





	All Was Golden

Ryan Ross wasn’t planning on falling in love. It wasn’t that he was actively avoiding it, but he had a plan. And that plan left no room for romance.

The first part of his plan was to get out of Spencer’s apartment. Eventually permanently, but for the meantime just for an hour or two. Leaving permanently would mean getting his own place, which would require money, which would require him to get a job. That all seemed like too much for Ryan to handle at that point in his life. 

It had been three weeks since Keltie had broken up with him, sixteen days since his father had died, and ten days since he had lost his job. Within a month, Ryan had gone from being happy and having his life together to dealing with his grief alone while crashing on his best friend’s couch. Everything had happened so quickly, and he felt like he was living in a life that wasn’t his own. He was days away from completely losing it, and on top of that, he was feeling guilty about intruding on Spencer. 

It wasn’t that Spencer was complaining. He was being completely welcoming and understanding, and Ryan loved him for that. But that being said, it was obvious that he wanted to have time alone with his boyfriend, and he and Jon always exchanged relieved looks when Ryan left for a little while. Plus, there was only so much brooding one should be forced to endure, and Spencer had actually rolled his eyes when he caught Ryan writing angsty poetry. 

With the amount he was writing, getting a job should’ve been easy. Ryan was a writer, after all. But everything he wrote seemed to lack his usual finesse, and was far too personal to share when he was that vulnerable. It would harm both his reputation and emotional state to add those to his portfolio. 

Ryan had left Spencer’s apartment with some excuse he’d already forgotten. Jon has cheerfully said bye to him, but Ryan could practically hear him and Spencer pouncing on each other before he even had the door closed all the way behind him. He didn’t know where he was going, he just knew that he needed to be alone with some fresh air for at least a little while. 

Without really meaning to, Ryan found himself at a park downtown. It was mid July, the late afternoon air pleasantly warm, just the right side of too hot. He’d heard of the park before, and people always said it had very beautiful flowers. Despite his practical view of the world, Ryan always held an appreciation for beauty. As a writer, he often found himself finding beauty in a lot of things. Lately, it had been finding the tragic beauty of his own suffering, but he could find it in more appealing forms as well. 

The flowers were beautiful. There was a large garden area in the center of the park that was filled with various shades of flowers, causing a sweet aroma to fill the air. Ryan breathed it in, walking slowly along the path, until he reached the tree in the middle of the garden. 

It took a while for Ryan to notice that he wasn’t the only one there. There was a man leaning over a book on the bench beneath the tree, an actual teacup in his hand. Ryan was unaware that anyone used actual teacups rather than mugs for anything that wasn’t at all formal, but found himself appreciating the man’s sense of class. He was planning to just walk by him, not acknowledge his existence, but right before he stopped staring, the man looked up. 

Ryan’s heart skipped a beat. 

This man’s eyes were a type of beautiful that Ryan had never seen before. These dark, chocolate colored depths that seemed to spiral down much deeper than they possibly could’ve. Ryan knew that it was never eyes themselves that portrayed emotion, but rather the muscles around them, but there was something about the smooth brown irises that seemed to hold meaning. 

They were somehow, impossibly, exactly what Ryan needed. All the pent up pain and angst inside of him, everything that he wanted to scream, every single way he wanted to lash out at the world, suddenly seemed insignificant. There was more to the world than his pain. There was real beauty outside of his own suffering. There was purpose in his life. This pair of beautiful, soulful eyes were exactly what gave him that revelation. 

Ryan didn’t believe in love at first sight. He really didn’t. He also didn’t plan on falling in love any time soon. He really didn’t. But for some strange reason, neither of those facts seemed to surface. 

“Hi,” Ryan said awkwardly, realizing he had just been staring intently at the other man for longer than socially acceptable. His nervous smile turned into a frown as he realized how shy he was acting, not used to freezing up like that. 

“Hi,” the other man replied, and Ryan realized he was staring back with an equally intense gaze, accentuated further by his gorgeous brown eyes and bright smile. Ryan found himself blushing, a feeling that he wasn’t used to and wasn’t sure if he enjoyed. 

“My name’s Ryan,” Ryan stated, shoving his hands in his pockets in order to resist the temptation to fidget with his scarf. The man’s smile grew impossibly wider, and he leaned forward, closing his book. 

“Hi Ryan. My name’s Brendon,” the man greeted, his voice bubbly and warm. Ryan had no idea how a voice could be that simultaneously energetic and soothing, but it was doing things to his heart. 

“Hey,” Ryan returned, his mouth twisting downwards as he realized that he was just standing there. Usually he could either get away with going unnoticed or fake confidence, and his failure to do either was making him uncomfortable. Resisting the urge to sigh, he attempted the second option. “May I sit next to you?”

“Hmm, that depends,” Brendon replied, a mock-thoughtful look settling on his face for a moment before morphing into a mischievous grin. “You can if you smile for me again.” Ryan quirked one eyebrow indignantly. 

“You can’t just make me smile on command,” Ryan argued, crossing his arms and staring at Brendon, his mouth stubbornly flat. 

“Oh, I think I can,” Brendon teased, waggling his eyebrows and biting his lip in a manner that was probably supposed to be seductive. It was such a ridiculous display that Ryan couldn’t help but let out a small laugh, which caused Brendon’s grin to reappear. “See, told you!”

“Fine,” Ryan grumbled, as if he hadn’t been the one to ask to sit down. Any annoyance he’d felt at Brendon’s antics seemed to melt when he saw how the other man’s eyes seemed to glow when he was happy. Ryan sat down on the bench next to Brendon, putting a respectable distance between them as to not come off as too forward. 

“So what brings you here today?” Brendon asked curiously, immediately scooting so he was pressed against Ryan’s side. Ryan’s face immediately flushed, but he realized he liked the feeling too much to try to do anything to prevent it. 

“A lot of things,” Ryan answered vaguely, not wanting to get into the long story of his tragic life. Brendon nodded sagely, as if that had been any sort of real answer, then cracked a smirk. 

“Do any of those things explain why you’re wearing not just one, but multiple scarves?” Brendon inquired, eyes glinting playfully as he reached out to flick at the end of one of Ryan’s scarves. 

“Because they’re fashionable,” Ryan defended, batting Brendon’s hand away from his scarf. And Brendon’s pointed look, he let out an aggrieved huff. “They are completely fashionable.”

“Maybe they are when it’s not eighty degrees outside,” Brendon compromised, the sincere look on his face almost believable. Ryan just rolled his eyes as Brendon snickered. 

“Like you’re one to talk. You’re holding an actual teacup right now,” Ryan pointed out smugly. Brendon looked down at his hand, as if he’d forgotten he was holding something, and let out a laugh when he saw that Ryan was correct. 

“Touché,” Brendon agreed with another laugh, smiling at Ryan with bright eyes that made his breath catch.

In that moment, there was a part of Ryan that wanted to run away. Feelings that strong for someone he’d just met couldn’t end in anything except for disaster. Especially when he was still dealing with so much in his life. It would probably be smart to make up some excuse to leave, to not risk hurting himself more and taking Brendon down with him. 

With a start, Ryan realized that he couldn’t. There was no way that he could bring himself to leave the park without knowing if he’d ever see Brendon again. Something about his brown eyes and bright voice made Ryan know in his heart that he had to stay, or he’d regret it for the rest of his life. So he stayed. 

“Oh my god, is that Chuck Palahniuk?” Ryan asked, glancing down at the book resting on Brendon’s lap. 

“It is! Are you a fan of his?” Brendon asked excitedly, seeming to practically vibrate with energy. If Ryan hadn’t been completely head over heels for him already, then that alone would have caused it. 

“Obviously,” Ryan enthused, and from there, the conversation seemed to flow naturally. They talked about everything, from literature to music, and Ryan even found out Brendon’s last name. Urie. He was fairly sure he was falling more and more in love with him with every word he said. 

“So,” Ryan started, what must’ve been an hour later, judging by the color of the sky. He fidgeted nervously with the tips of his scarves for a moment before forcing himself to stop. “Would you like, want to get coffee or something sometime?” Ryan was completely sure he’d been more competent at asking people out before that moment. Brendon’s face seemed to glow for a moment, but the expression was quickly lost as he bit his lip uncertainly. 

“Just because I’m peppy and flirty and overly trusting and really hot doesn’t mean I like getting strung along,” Brendon blurted out after a long moment of silence. 

“What?” Ryan couldn’t help but ask, in no way following the other man’s train of thought. Brendon sighed, looking down and gripping his now-empty teacup tightly. 

“It’s just that I’m not really looking for a short-term fling right now, and I want to at least try at a serious relationship. If you’re willing to give that, then of course, because I really like you, even already. But I just don’t want to like, leave myself open to heartbreak. So I’d really love to go out with you, as long as you can promise not to leave me before at least giving me a chance at something long term.” Brendon’s eyes were wide and hopeful, his tone more serious than it had been for any other part of the conversation. Ryan found he had no choice except to smile comfortingly. 

“I promise, Brendon,” Ryan vowed, almost surprised to realize he was being completely honest. A wide grin slowly crept across Brendon’s face at that. 

“Then it’s a date, Ryan Ross,” Brendon said happily, leaning his head against Ryan’s shoulder. Ryan’s cheeks hurt from smiling, a feeling he hadn’t experienced in weeks, but one he was definitely enjoying. 

“I can’t wait,” Ryan replied honestly, wrapping one arm around Brendon’s waist. The other man sighed contentedly, and there were a few long moments of peaceful silence between them. 

“Do you believe in love at first sight?” Brendon, unsurprisingly, was the one to break the silence, not lifting his head from Ryan’s shoulder when he spoke. Ryan tensed, not sure how to answer the question. He was a writer, the words should’ve come easily, but he was just reevaluating his views and the emotions were all tangled together. 

“I didn’t,” Ryan answered honestly, knowing he was being vague but not sure of what else to say. He looked down at Brendon, who was frowning slightly. 

“What changed?” For a moment, Ryan considered making some smart comment about never having said his beliefs had changed, or giving another vague answer. He had a feeling that Brendon wouldn’t accept either of those. 

“I saw you.” Ryan completely shocked himself by telling the truth. Brendon did move them, sitting up and grinning devilishly while Ryan tried to fight his steadily growing blush. 

“That,” Brendon began, his voice somewhere between delighted and accusatory, “was the cheesiest thing that anyone has ever said to me. Ever.”

“Well, that was the cheesiest thing that I’ve ever said to anyone,” Ryan admitted, which caused Brendon to scoot impossibly closer to him. 

“That’s why we’re perfect for each other,” Brendon stated decisively, and Ryan grinned despite himself. He looked back out at the view of the garden, at the now setting sun burning fire in the horizon. His mind automatically registered the beauty in that, almost as quickly as it had registered the beauty in Brendon. 

“The sunset is pretty,” Ryan mused, his eyes traveling back to Brendon as he once again leaned against his side. His breath almost caught at the way the warm shades of the sky reflected in Brendon’s dark eyes, and wondered how often he would end up getting lost in those. 

“Mhm,” Brendon agreed with a nod, turning his head to place his chin on Ryan’s shoulder. “You’re golden.” It took Ryan a second to register that he was talking about the way the last rays of the sun bathed everything in a golden light. 

“I think everything is golden,” Ryan pointed out, and Brendon rolled his eyes, an amused smirk playing over his full lips. Ryan couldn’t help the way his eyes traveled downward to stare. 

“Maybe that’s a sign,” Brendon purred, and a moment later their lips met. In that instant, Ryan was sure that life would get better, and kissed back with all his might.


End file.
